How I work
Direct does not mean cold.
There is room here for trauma, grief, anger, shame, uncertainty, and the things that are difficult to say out loud. We can take time to understand what is happening, while keeping sight of what you need from counselling.
What brings people in
There is no single kind of work.
People come to counselling for different reasons.
01 Sometimes something has happened and you need somewhere to make sense of it.
02 Sometimes the same thing keeps happening, in your relationships, your reactions, the ways you cope, or the choices you make when you are overwhelmed.
03 Sometimes you need practical help getting through the week before you have the capacity to look underneath any of it.
04 Sometimes life looks manageable from the outside but feels empty, unsustainable, or no longer like your own.
05 Sometimes you are grieving something that cannot be fixed and trying to work out how to live alongside it.
The work
Practical, exploratory, or both.
We can focus on reducing distress without pretending your history does not matter. We can explore where something came from without losing sight of the life you have to live now.
When things feel unmanageable
We may focus first on getting through the immediate situation, reducing the intensity, building practical skills, or making daily life more manageable. Insight is not always the first priority when your life is actively on fire.
When you need to understand
We may slow down and look at history, relationships, attachment, beliefs, identity, grief, meaning, or the parts of your experience that do not yet make sense. Understanding can give you more choice in how you respond.
When something needs to change
We may work directly with behaviour, communication, boundaries, avoidance, conflict, coping, or a pattern that keeps taking you somewhere you do not want to go.
These are not separate stages. We may move between them, or work with all three, in the same session.
Fit
We should be able to work honestly together.
You can disagree with me, tell me I have misunderstood, or say that something we are doing is not helping. I take an active part in our conversations, and we can talk about the pace and what you feel ready to explore.
I may notice a contradiction, return to something we moved past quickly, or ask about a pattern that seems important. We can look at what it does for you, what it costs you, and whether you want something different. You can question my understanding, too.
Methods and tools
How I choose an approach.
My work is integrative, which means I draw on more than one counselling approach. We consider what brings you in, what you want from counselling, and what has or has not been useful before.
Sometimes we use practical skills; sometimes we spend more time understanding an experience or a recurring pattern. I will explain what I am suggesting and why, and we can revisit the approach as we go.
The approaches below give you a sense of what I draw from. You do not need to choose one before we meet.
Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT)
Looking at the connections between thoughts, feelings and actions, and trying different responses to situations that are difficult for you.
Rational emotive behaviour therapy (REBT)
Examining rigid beliefs and expectations about yourself, other people or how life should be, and exploring more flexible ways of responding.
Dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT)
Holding two things together: your responses can make sense given what you have lived through, and some of them may need to change. DBT brings acceptance and change into the same conversation, alongside practical ways to work with emotions, distress and relationships.
Acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT)
Noticing when you are caught up in thoughts, avoiding difficult experiences, or moving through life on autopilot. ACT focuses on responding more flexibly, connecting with what matters to you, and taking action in that direction, even when discomfort comes along.
Cognitive processing therapy (CPT)
Examining how trauma has affected beliefs about yourself, other people and the world, including questions of blame, safety and trust.
Cognitive analytic therapy (CAT)
Mapping recurring patterns in how you relate to yourself and other people, exploring how they developed and identifying opportunities to respond differently.
Motivational interviewing
Exploring mixed feelings about change, your own reasons for wanting something different, and what you feel ready to do.
Attachment-informed work
Exploring how experiences of closeness, care and trust shape what you expect and how you respond in relationships now.
Attention to systems and context
Considering the family, cultural, workplace and social contexts around you, including the pressures and resources that affect your choices.
Areas of work
Some things need more room.
These pages go further into several areas of my practice: what may bring you in, how I understand the work, and what you can expect from me in the room.
Trauma counselling
When what happened is over but its effects continue to shape safety, trust, relationships, and daily life.
Explore trauma counselling 02Couples counselling
For recurring conflict, damaged trust, distance, and decisions about what the relationship needs next.
Explore couples counselling 03First responders and public safety
Critical incidents, cumulative operational stress, moral injury, organisational betrayal, and the impact of work at home.
Explore public-safety counselling 04Grief and complicated grief
Grief, traumatic loss, guilt, estrangement, and losses that other people may not fully recognise.
Explore grief counselling 05Justice involvement, violence, and harm
For people who have caused harm, experienced it, or are living in the complicated space around violence, coercive control, and justice involvement.
Explore justice-involved counsellingA place to start
Bring what is actually happening.
A free 20-minute fit check gives us time to talk about what brings you here, what you are looking for, and whether working together makes sense. You do not need the whole story ready.